Why men need to stop complaining that women are Goldiggers

I’m tired of hearing men describing women as whores, bitches, and golddiggers. Still today the majority of men who are saying this are also single. Whether they’re single by choice or because they have a few ideas not entirely screwed in properly, I would like to write my next little bleeg (I’m calling my blog “bleegs” because I don’t believe this is a proper blog) about these men. You can ask yourself why I have male friends like this, of course, but that would be delving into an entirely different subject, which I will leave for now.

I suppose in order to first understand why men are calling women names and revealing many states of distrust, is to first understand the circumstances in which we are now. As I have already mentioned my personal belief system, that feminism has created these circumstances of wishing women to be men rather than be women with equal rights to men but specifically designed for women, then you will understand men’s distrust. Not only do men now understand that women enjoy sex just as much or more as they do, they also know that women do not need men in order to have children. And many women, such as myself, have taken it upon themselves to have and raise their own children. I just read an article that said a large percentage of children are currently being born to single parents. Did that mean “single’ as in “unmarried”? Or did it mean “single” as in the man has vanished from the picture. Because certainly in places like Quebec women and men are having children not married, and living happily, as in many parts of the world: being ‘unwed” does not necessarily mean that women are having children “single”; there could be fathers involved. 

As for myself, I did plan on getting married but the pregnancy came first and when that happened the wedding didn’t happen, and I just had to live with that. It was probably for the best. But I digress........

My male friends keep complaining about golddiggers. Some of my male friends demand that a woman have an equally successful a career as they do in order to be dateable.  

It’s fine for men and women to both have successful careers and earn money, so long as you do not wish to have children. I honestly do not know how other women do this, I consider them like machines, but they work all through their pregnancies and then the minute they give birth, they have one year of maternity leave (in Canada and Australia) to raise their child and then they must return to work. This is dictated by law. A woman at that point must figure out what to do with their 1 year old infant. Usually women hire nannies or put their children in daycares, and then go back to work.

Now if a man is involved there are two incomes involved then chances are the man’s income will be higher than the woman's. I will not do the math but what ends up happening is that half or more than half of a woman’s salary goes to the childcare and more often than not couples will end deciding that the woman’s income is not worth the bother and she should just stay home and raise the children. Many women want to stay home but feel embarrassed about the loss of their careers and many women are bitter at the loss of their careers and get depressed staying at home. As this topic of childcare alone is an issue unto itself I will continue with the main agenda.

So, men, when meeting women are concerned that women are just golddiggers.

Ok - let’s keep this in perspective.

Men: 

When you meet a woman you are judging her based on her appearance and perhaps some other qualities. It’s only reasonable to presume that women are judging you as well. There is actually nothing wrong with a woman judging you based on your salary or ability to be responsible. If a woman is interested in having children she’s going to want to know that you will be a caring person to these children and that you will “provide” for them. If you are so fearful and tight with your wallet than, in my opinion, that is a translation of how cheap you are with your heart and affection. You cannot enter relationships with financial distrust. 

I can tell you from personal experience this financial distrust has destroyed many of my attempts at having a relationship: my daughter’s father was so concerned that I would eventually leave him and take half of his money he decided to post-pone our wedding even after I got pregnant, unilaterally, causing me to feel all sorts of grief and upset. Whatever his reasons, he is now still living alone 7 years later and I sincerely feel that at one point he regretted his decision. What ended up happening in our circumstances was that although he ran away he did eventually have to start paying child support, the only difference is that while he could have been more “open” about his financial circumstances and living with us initially,  he ended up living without me and without his daughter. His distrust for women was so extreme and offensive, and for the most part, still is today. 

****(On a side note, he was much more generous 7 years later when we went to visit him in Australia and I would like to think that he possibly learned his “lesson” of mistreating (a woman like me). 

But I digress again. 

If men wish to have children then they must be generous to their prospective mothers of their children. This is really the only way to create true equality. Men will never be able to have children on their own and women will always carry this burden. Unless the majority of men wish for the population to die off and they wish to die paying nurses to take care of them rather than their own children, they have that choice. 

I personally did not enjoy pregnancy. Nor do I wish to be a stay at home mother. But the alternative of not having any children is worse. 

Men must begin to understand that having a woman in their life is an opportunity and it saddens me when men fail to understand the larger picture as to why women judge men the way they do. None of it is bad. Of course there are “people” who wish to use others and take advantage and take their money but I would like to hope that the majority of people, men and women, but particularly women, are just looking into their biological best interest: if you do not have a job or ability to earn a living you really lower your prospective of finding a woman to have children with you, and men cannot be bitter for this. On the contrary, men who have lots of money would really benefit from having a wife and children to take care of. They may say they enjoy being alone and growing older with their money but I am certain that the minute their health starts to fail they will begin to regret these decisions. I am not saying that children will necessarily take care of their parents in their old age but one hopes they would. 

If you want to see the world and it’s human inhabitants start to fade, then do not have children. Do not listen to me. But if you wish to understand things more deeply then you need to understand that although money is a necessity it is not a biological imperative: children are. And women are just seeking ways to have them. They are not all “golddiggers” for this reason. 


* If you're wondering why I underlined math it's because I originally put it as "man".